molly.com

Thursday 27 July 2006

Dear John (Dvorak)

Dear John,

I know it will come as a complete shock to you and everyone who knows me to find out I’ve actually been holding my tongue and waiting to respond to this one.

You see, I had to sort through a few emotional issues before talking with you. Some suggest that answering you could be a bad thing.

That’s my first inclination: Ignore the problem, it will go away. But then again, others advocate challenging your CSS issues head-on.

Not ever having been a wilting rose in this relationship, I suppose at the end of the day I’m going to have to speak my mind. But instead of having a tantrum, I’m going to make it very, very easy on you.

In fact, I’m going to make you an offer that would fully and totally break my heart if you refuse. The offer? I will come to you and help you learn CSS.

Give me two days, dear John, and I promise you will know the Cascade intimately. You will understand origin, sort order, even the specificity algorithm. I will teach you the secrets of CSS in a way that I am sure no one has ever taught you before. You will be able to float, position and even hover in ways you probably never imagined possible.

I will teach you why you don’t need hacks, or when you do. I will teach you the workarounds, the ups and downs, the ins and outs. I will do this for free, at my expense, on my dime and on my time because I’m just that convinced that all you need is a little CSS love.

Please, John. This was a very difficult letter to write. You know how I feel about things. You know I want my love for CSS to be our love, together, as it was meant to be. I hope you will have an answer for me soon.

Love always,
Molly

Filed under:   faith(less), humor, standards, software, web design and development, WaSP, society
Posted by:   Molly | 2:29 pm |

173 Responses to “Dear John (Dvorak)”

  1. david anderson Says:

    That’s the weirdest “Dear John” letter I’ve ever read. I wish I could read the first draft, I bet it was much less… restrained.

  2. nortypig Says:

    ha ha… nice gesture molly (and kind of spooky like a stalker lol)…

    i’m not sure i’d be doing it for free though but good on you for putting it out there. The key to overcoming ignorance is education.

    The Guatama Buddha said “All criticism is based on ignorance”.

  3. Niccolò Zamborlini Says:

    Molly knows best.

  4. Malarkey Says:

    There ain’t no arguing with that! :)

  5. Lea Says:

    Molly, this is an incredibly generous offer and I thank you on behalf of the rest of the community for making such an open-hearted offer.
    Hopefully Mr Dvorak will realise the value he is being offered and take advantage of it!
    He cannot help but be won over by your teaching ability (and charms) :)

  6. Molly Says:

    David: Actually,that was pretty much the first draft, give or take a few words. Really!

    Norty: Oh right, *I’m the stalker*

    DO you think?

    Niccolo, No, amore, non.

    Malarkey: You got that right, and a 67 Lamb too.

    Lea: Thank goodness someone sees the seriousness to my joke. I would so be there! I love to teach CSS and I bet even John might find himself informed if not inspired.

    Thanks my friends! I was hesitant to put up this post. I’m really glad to get support.

    Love/m

  7. kartooner Says:

    Now, let’s wait in anticipation to see if he takes you up on your offer. Oh yeah, what’s CSS? ;)

  8. Dmitry Baranovskiy Says:

    I feel so uncomfortable, that I read it… It looks so private…

  9. » Kann man CSS verlieren? — cne _LOG Archiv Says:

    […] Nachtrag: Auch Molly Holzschlag und Eric Meyer haben auf Dvorak reagiert. Eric Meyer kann der Haltung Dvoraks sogar nch etwas Gutes abgewinnen: Consequently, it reminds us to keep advocating for greater consistency between browsers, to praise the efforts of browser makers in that direction, and to help them correct their course when they move in the wrong direction—and to do so constructively, not destructively. For while we may gain insights from the rantings of trolls, we should never be so foolish as to adopt their tactics. Tags: CSS, Fun « S5Project.org Designer über Trends, Teil 2 » […]

  10. mattymcg Says:

    I feel so uncomfortable, that I read it… It looks so private…

    Hmm, new to this blog Dmitry? Try trawling through the archives if you want personal :)

  11. Adam Schilling Says:

    Bravo!

  12. bruce Says:

    Can I tag along to the class too?

  13. DrumsNWhistles Says:

    Great offer, Molly. I hope he’ll take you up on it. I know that if anyone can show John how to overcome his CD (cascade dysfunction), it’s you.

    DnW

  14. Michael Says:

    If he doesn’t take you up on the offer, I will!
    Respect…

  15. JackP Says:

    Make sure you show him Malarkey’s specificity wars document. CSS and Darth Vader, what a combination :-)

  16. Conrad Says:

    Wow - Awesome offer I wish it was me - CSS sux lets go back to tables - (Molly fancy teaching me)?

    OR ELSE I STAND MY MY STATEMENT!

    hihihi

  17. Olly Says:

    I’m not so sure you can teach an old dog new tricks :-)

  18. Steven Tew Says:

    What a generous offer Molly. I sincerely hope John understands that your intentions are genuine. But my gut says he’ll find it easier to ignore you than to accept. Shame if he does.

  19. Veerle Pieters Says:

    Well John is fool if he doesn’t answer. If I was a guy I would love to receive a letter like that, from the greatest woman on the web;) He should know that you can’t ignore the love for CSS :)

  20. Lauchlin Says:

    As I commented on Eric’s rebuttal, it’s all about his area of expertise, and you really hit the nail on the head here. I feel like I’m watching that show on Discovery Channel, Dirty Jobs. He digs his hand into a job, that he doesn’t know how to do, and then spends the entire episode complaining about it.

    I think the correct letter to Mr. Dvorak should be:

    Dear John,
    If you want your website redesigned, there are plenty of web designers who would be happy to consult with you and produce exactly the kind of website you want. If you would like to design your own website, there are plenty of websites out there that provide templates that don’t require any knowledge of CSS.

    Thank you,

  21. Jules Says:

    Can I replace John with Jules?

  22. Nate K Says:

    Thats the best dear john letter. Hands down.

    And, I hope he takes you up on your offer! This is the response we need. We all know he, obviously, doesn’t understand CSS. And we all know that at one point it was frustrating for us. Jumping in and offering to HELP someone is a great option, and one that will benefit both you and John.

  23. » More on Dvorak and the Friday Funny Wheelz Online: IT and other things Says:

    […] Finally on this subject check out Molly’s letter to the man himself. […]

  24. WeBreakStuff » Weekly inspiration - 28th July 2006 Says:

    […] Molly’s funny (or is it?) reply to John C Dvorak’s post on “the problems with CSS code“. This quote speaks for itself: “In fact, I’m going to make you an offer that would fully and totally break my heart if you refuse. The offer? I will come to you and help you learn CSS. (…) You will be able to float, position and even hover in ways you probably never imagined possible.“ […]

  25. Oniel Says:

    Some folks are so lucky :)

  26. SB Says:

    I missed the leadup to this — but I sure enjoyed your response. A smile on a Friday morning; thanks.

    I think I may begin to follow this drama with some interest…

  27. Scott's DasBlog Says:

    Dvorak Does CSS

  28. Paul Boag Says:

    Its not often a blog post makes me laugh out loud. Thanks Molly, you have brightened up a long and intense Friday!

  29. Danny Sanchez Says:

    It’s going to take me a while to not giggle impishly inside when I type “hover” “float” and “position.”

  30. Simon Dvorak Says:

    Ok, don’t get me wrong. I read JD’s article a week or so ago too. I rolled my eyes and thought, “Well, everyone’s got to make a living…” However, doesn’t he have a point in there?

    Let’s take what I am currently dealing with (or refusing to accept and finding ways to ignore it like reading blogs): browser bugs/css misinterpretations/*features*. I’ve been working on a new web template for an entire unit at U.C. Davis. The old pages were a scattered assortment of of the nastiest HTML you’d ever NOT want to see.

    Anyway, as part of the page template, a committee wanted to have two even columns and it was up to me to figure out how to do this. I happened across a great technique (http://www.positioniseverything.net/articles/onetruelayout/equalheight). Yay!

    Now it is several months later and the project is wrapping up…except today someone decided to throw in some links to named anchors…Firefox promptly turns around and shows it ass (http://www.positioniseverything.net/articles/onetruelayout/appendix/equalheightproblems)
    In my case, no other browser does this. There is no solution apart from a redesign.

    Now, I LOVE CSS! It has made my life 110% better than when I was futzing with tables and the like. But, it is far from perfect and yes it can be a total can of worms at times. This type of thing is very frustrating even for someone who knows how to float, position and hover.

    P.S. No, I’m not related to John. Oh, anyone going to Seattle Sept 18th?

  31. Ron Says:

    Well that certainly is an offer worth considering. I wonder if he can get down off the soapbox that seems to be permanently attached to his feet. I usually like to hear what JD has to say, but to bad-mouth CSS is so retro and so not kewl.

    Molly you can teach me the ins and outs of the specificity algorithm anytime….I promise I won’t cringe.

    Nice counterpoint.

    r

  32. Max Design » Some links for light reading (19/7/06) Says:

    […] Dear John (Dvorak) […]

  33. Ron van den Boogaard Says:

    Some years ago I would have totally agreed with Mr. Dvorak. The frustration can be tremendeous. And that is all this article -”Why CSS bugs me”- is. Venting frustration. CSS is like Maleysian, you can learn it in a ten minutes, to properly understand it takes ten years.

    The mere fact that it would take someone like you to teach him the ins and outs illustrates the point of the steep learning curve.

    To the less devoted like John Dvorak (he only wants to style his blog) there might be a point where the frustration wins over the willingness to learn CSS. They will quit and reside to oldskool code again.

    Perhaps there is a point in his point we should take seriously. (And that won’t be solved by CSS3 :) )

  34. Diane Says:

    I don’t think Dvorak’s article is even worth commenting about. I don’t know who the heck he is–apparently he’s famous or something. But not knowing who he is, he just sounds like a newbie who probably just spent a long, late night fussing with something that just wouldn’t work. We’ve all been there.

    Yes, it can be frustrating. Yes the cascade can be confusing. But he’s equating his confusion and frustration to there being a problem with it. And he’s blaming the different browser rendering issues on the wrong thing.

    At the same time, CSS evangelists want to believe that CSS is a mighty panacea. Well, it is a wonderful tool, but like all the others out there, has limitations and places where it fails.

    Anyway, it’s a great response you gave. I wish it was me getting a personal lesson. I can never get the supposed “one true” examples on the web to work and always resort to rolling my own.

  35. Sebastian Kippe » Weblog » Archiv » Feeding John Dvorak Says:

    […] Natürlich konnte sich nach den teilweise ungeheuerlichen Anschuldigungen von Seiten Dvoraks auch die Webstandards-Szene zahlreicher Antworten nicht erwehren. Molly Holzschlag z.B. bot ihm einen privaten Intensivkurs in CSS an, Andere wiederum beließen es bei ausführlichen, fachlich fundierten Antworten. […]

  36. collisionbend.com - A Cleveland Ohio Weblog by Will Kessel » (Dvoraked) Says:

    […] Molly, Eric: instead of one of you — or both of you — going to John, let’s have John come here — to Cleveland, Ohio. […]

  37. Sheri German Says:

    Yes, CSS has a learning curve and can be frustrating. Sometimes we need to debug. These same issues apply to more traditional programming, but does anyone question its validity? Or that it takes time and determination to learn? We study the skills of our trade and become professionals. Don’t we often have conversations about the “anyone can do Web pages” mentality? ‘

    My son takes viola lessons with a professional violist. My son can fool around on the instrument and produce some sounds. His teacher insists that he do things properly, according to the principles that generate the truest results and create real art. My son is becoming well-trained. This is clearly more difficult than doodling. But if it were so easy, anyone could do it, no?

    Every profession requires time and effort to perfect, and it is always an ongoing process that evolves and continues throughout one’s professional life. No field is a static and completed picture at any point in time. I am trying to understand why some people think Web design should be any different. Or perhaps they don’t think it is a serious endeavor?

  38. Tegou Says:

    Whew, what a rebuttal. I don’t know whether I should be laughing or taking a cold shower…

    ;-)

  39. John C. Dvorak Says:

    two days?? I s that as in two earth days??

    OK! DEAL

  40. Out » Blog Archive » Well! Molly and John! Says:

    […] It seems John Dvorak has a date with none other than Molly Holzschlag herself. The very generous Ms Holzschlag offered to teach him CSS in two days in an open letter and he accepted! […]

  41. Molly Says:

    Why yes, John, two earth days.

    I just sent you an email:

    “Okay John,

    When’s our two earth day date with CSS? Let’s make it happen.

    Ready to float, position and hover, I am always,
    Molly”

  42. bliss Says:

    Wow! the tigress roars! but this article is soothing my love for css that was just bruised by john!

    thanks molly

  43. Kathy C Says:

    Right… now I know how to learn CSS in the best way possible with the best teacher ever. Write an article to annoy Molly :D

    Ah… small problem… She knows my name and what I look like… Damn. Maybe she’ll have forgotten ! **fingers crossed, let’s get typing !**

    (Seriously, I, like most, or even all, people who have used CSS to some extent have spent long hours fiddling around trying to understand and get things to work, but with CSS as with any other language, it wouldn’t occur to me to blame the tool, only the person using it. Remember, to err is human, to hover is CSS, and to completely f*** things up is IE…)

  44. Gurukarm Says:

    OMG Molly - I don’t know about Mr. Dvorak, but I’d take you up on this offer in a heartbeat!! While I use CSS regularly in the pages I maintain (which were mostly all created about 5+ years ago under tables, tables, and more tables - with a few clear.gifs thrown in - trying slowly slowly to convert them where possible), I feel like I’m shooting in the dark most of the time. I’ve taught myself all I know from books, websites, etc, but as Dave Cross of NAPP says when giving Photoshop seminars, “the trouble with teaching yourself is the teacher”. Yep. Know any good classes you’d recommend??

    :-)

  45. Jens Meiert Says:

    I just cannot hold back this exceptional comment: Nice.

  46. Adam Farnsworth Says:

    As so many people have said, I’d take you up on the offer! You know, that might not be a bad idea. Instead of conferences en mass, you could signup for one-on-one tutoring with CSS (or choose your language) gurus!

  47. Channy’s Blog » Dvorak, 엿같은 CSS Says:

    […] 이에 대해, 에릭 마이어(Eric Meyer)가 Dvoraked에서 “Don’t feed the trolls”이라면서 확 무시해버리는 군요. 드보락은 존경받는 트롤(Troll)이라면서… 게다가 John Allsopp은 드보락 블로그 재디자인 경진대회까지 열고 있구요. Molly는 아주 완곡한 어투의 편지에서 이틀 만에 CSS에 대한 오해를 다 풀어주겠다고 썼습니다. 아릿다운 아가씨가 자기 돈으로 옆에서 직접 가르쳐 준다니 드보락은 당연히 “Okay! Deal.”이라고 외쳤습니다. […]

  48. .NET Developer News Says:

    Web Standards and why we care

    There has been a number of interesting threads going on around this subject, particularly as it concerns

  49. Dan Says:

    So if I write an article for a major magazine bashing CSS can I also get personalized free lessons?

  50. Technikwürze - Design & Webstandards Podcast » Blog Archiv » Technikwürze 32 - Gehälter und die Links Says:

    […] Wie in der letzten Ausgabe der Technikwürze bereits berichtet, hat ein PCMagazine-Artikel von John Dvorak über CSS für viel Aufregung in der Webstandardsgemeinde gesorgt. In der letzten Woche meldeten sich auch Molly Holzschlag und Eric Meyer zu Wort. CSS-Guru Meyer sah die Kolumne Dvoraks allerdings auch positiv: […]

  51. Ian Lloyd Says:

    Dan - I was thinking just the same. In fact, I’m going to write a piece about what’s wrong with the Aston Martin DB7 and wait for the call from the car company to be proven wrong :-D

    Molly - I can’t wait to find out how it goes!

  52. WD Milner Says:

    JD is one of those love/hate types of columnists. Not that you eiither love or hate him completely but you either want to high-five him for some articles and half-drown him for others. He is thought provoking if nothing else. In this case I just remember one line from his own website’s TOS - “Most of what is on this website is bullshit and should be treated as such.”

    And Molly - if you’re giving out personal CSS lessons . . . ;)

  53. Pat O Says:

    I’m late to the party (as usual), still I wanted to put in my two cents and say that I think Mr Dvorak is mostly correct. Obviously, he makes his living bucking standards. Still that doesn’t mean that he is always wrong. In fact I think he has a following because he is often right. As far as CSS goes, let’s start with my background. I am a geek and a hacker in the oldest sense of the word (the model railroading sense). I program for a living and built/program robots for fun. I work on various open source projects to unwind. I have neither the apptitude, nor the interest to be a designer. And my color vision sucks. Still, I believe in the power of the world wide web. I am inclide to follow standards unless there is a compelling reason not too. So I have played with CSS on and off for years. I have read several book, looked at online tutorials, and followed various blogs including this one. I must say that I don’t get it. I have yet to create a stylesheet myself, that I was happy with.
    This is entirely due to the fact that I don’t do CSS on a daily basis. When I have tried it, I was focused on creating content and wanted it to look nice. My solution to this conundrum is Open Source Web Design. I find a look that I like and I use it. My point is that even if Molly were willing to teach me CSS, it wouldn’t help. Sure in a week or so I could become a master with CSS and have a site that looked just as I wished. Unfortunately in 6 months when I am ready to redo my site all of that knowledge would have leaked out of my head to make room for TCP stack details, and the proper way to build and access an object graph. Either I would have to be taught again, or more likely I will simply use someone elses design.
    CSS is too involved for the trivial user. Yes it is quite powerful, but simple things are not simple in CSS. Just laying out a page is an involved and confusing exercise. I don’t want to be an expert in CSS, I get paid to be an expert in other things, I want to have a good looking site though. Since there are no tools/techniques that I am aware of for doing simple layout with CSS, I am stuck using someone elses idea of good design.
    This is not necessarily a bad thing. It may be that site layout is just complex, but I believe that CSS adds to the complexity, rather than simplifying it.

    Tanks for your support
    Pat O

    _ _ _
    / \== / \== / \==

  54. Pat O Says:

    BTW, the odd text at the bottom of my post is suppose to be:

    _ _ _
    / \== / \== / \==
    &ltooo&gt &ltooo&gt &ltooo&gt

    which if you look at it with a non-proportional font sort of looks like tanks.

  55. Stephanie Sullivan Says:

    @Pat O: And that’s the reason you hire people like us to do the CSS portion of the work and we hire people like you to do what you do. Specialty and cooperation is the way to go and noone is an expert at everything.

    (Nice post, Molly … if that was really John replying, I can’t wait to hear how it goes. ;) )

  56. Conrad Says:

    @PAT 0: Very true, but we don’t go and and try and learn TCP stack details *confused*, and then when we can’t do it, use our weight in the industry to rubbish the whole concept of it, and throw all thats involved in the pit with it, do we?

    If you don’t understand it and don’t have the desire to learn and use it shut up and stick to what you know! ( that comment is for MR JD - not you)

    Who wants to be a Jack of all trades and master of none?

    Certainly not me

  57. Pat O Says:

    BTW, assuming you do get together with Mr Dvorak, I would love to get a transcript/video/notes/whatever. Perhaps my issues with CSS is that I have never been properly taugh?

    Pat O

  58. Conrad Says:

    taught? sure, thats it.

  59. l Says:

    check out my website, it will make Mr. D. proud.

  60. Dan Rubin Says:

    Dear Molly,

    John only loves your CSS more because you offered it first. I would have ConfeSSed my intent to make love to his markup had I not found your letter sitting on his desk.

    Though my heart shall remain heavy, I will not hold a grudge. In fact, how could I? Your selector is much more specific than mine…

    Yours,
    Dan

  61. pattyb Says:

    Boy would I love to be a mouse in the corner during those two earth days! Please be sure to let us read all about how it went.

  62. Chris Hester Says:

    The basics of CSS are exceptionally easy. But Pat O is right in that layouts are mindnumbingly complex and over-frustrating, even for experts. It was with delight that I recently received a free booklet with .net magazine (of which Molly is an editorial adviser), which is also known as Web Builder magazine in the States. The booklet was called “The CSS Anthology: 14 Essential Tips, Tricks & Hacks” by the talented Rachel Andrew, published by Sitepoint. It gave some rock-solid and easy-to-follow examples of common layouts you might want to build. So really, all you have to do is subscribe to a magazine like .net, buy a book, or search online, and layouts can be made easy.

    I would particularly like to recommend these sites for anyone confounded by CSS:

    Blue Robot, for examples of many simple layouts:
    http://www.bluerobot.com

    Position Is Everything, for cross-browser solutions, and some great example layouts:
    http://positioniseverything.net

  63. Robert Says:

    Damn wish I was John! I’m a CSS virgin and would love to learn from the best. Hopefully, a dialogue of the training will be presented after the fact.

  64. Dan Rubin’s SuperfluousBanter (Orangina Edition) » Blog Archive » Dvorak’s Cry For Help Says:

    […] Now, as I myself have only become aware of Dear John’s consternation (due, of course, to my head being stuck inside a Word document — let’s not even talk about me not hearing about the whole Castro power switch, living in South Florida and all…), I felt that it is my duty as a responsible member of the CSS community to help out in some way, albeit a few days behind everyone else. […]

  65. Blog Standard Stuff » Dear John (Dvorak) Says:

    […] So, Molly offered 2 days of training gratis, and now it’s my turn to offer something for Mr Dvorak (well, me Jeff, Dan and Colly collectively). We’re giving him a copy of Beginning CSS Web Development followed by Pro CSS Techniques (once we’ve finished writing it - I’m halfway through my allotted 4 chapters!). Let’s hope it does the job, eh? […]

  66. Sean Says:

    I think that John himself qualifies the column (and at the same time permits us to ignore it as blather) in the title itself: “Why CSS Bugs *ME*”. It bugs John (and a select few who don’t understand it) and this is one of the problems with the web professional community in its current state. Hobbyists try to walk in step with the professionals like very few other professions. I recently installed two ceiling fans in my house, after many hours of sweating, grunting, swearing, and nearly electrocuting myself. But I don’t A) think that this means the electical setup in homes is stupid, or B) try to pass myself off as a lighting expert now.

    Dvorak’s soapboxing reminds me of Richard Petty’s reactions to Danica Patrick enjoying a measure of success in car racing, in that he’s giving away his own obselescence in the industry. He’s a dinosaur that refuses to evolve (or understand the nature of evolution) as the world evolves around them. At this rate, he’ll be extinct in no time.

  67. Max Design » Some links for light reading (28/7/06) Says:

    […] Dear John (Dvorak) […]

  68. Aravind’s Link Blog » Same old argument Says:

    […] Dvorak, my favorite TWIT army member, wrote an article about CSS and why it is bugging him. Eric Meyer, a well know CSS expert, gave a nice response and interestingly molly, another famous person involved in CSS and web standards, gave a shocking response. Check them out. […]

  69. Mark R. Brown Says:

    Dear, Dear Molly, if you are going to begin to fix John Dvorak, I would think his CSS problems would be WAY down the list. There is just so much that is deeply wrong about the man…
    :)

  70. mike Says:

    There’s nothing “wrong” with Dvorak. He’s just expressing himself as everyone else SHOULD be allowed to. Funny thing I’ve noticed in the recent decade or so is that freedom of expression is OK only if it is an expression that the MAJORITY can agree on — otherwise the person doing the expressing is the outcast and is therefor asked NOT to expression oneself.

    This hypocrisy thing is what doesn’t get past my logic net. Say one thing - do another. Speak out of both sides of the mouth. Either the man has a right to an opinion or he doesn’t. Being that he’s been writing that column WAY BEFORE you could imagine, probably before many of you discovered what computers are or what they can do, gives him a slight edge. I think his publisher probably agrees as well.

    Personally, I don’t think he gives a crap what you folks think and neither should you give a crap what he writes. It IS a free nation, the USA that is. UNLESS you’re doing or saying something that the majority doesn’t like. Hmm… chastising him sounds more like nazi Germany to me.

    Maybe you could all learn something from his gripes instead of shooting back at the guy. He MIGHT actually have a real issue with CSS and someone COULD have taken the opportunity to contact him privately, assist him and, well, learn something themselves in the process.

    Nice folks you all are. Nice.

    Oh, and “Mark - August 11th, 2006 at 12:22 pm” - there’s nothing “deeply wrong” with not agreeing with the MAJORITY. That is, in fact, how things like CSS and other standards get formed because people were SICK of the CURRENT standard. But, of course, these are the hypocritical changes that people like, no - dont like, wait: is it like today or is it dislike.. WHAT ever.

  71. Shatil Says:

    Can I get free training too?

    Please?

    haha, good luck with Mr. Dvorak. Good luck indeed.

    - shatil

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