molly.com
Wednesday 7 December 2005
Pride Goeth After A Fall
WHAT WOULD YOU DO? I’m pulling into a parking spot at the corner market when I notice a wheelchair on its side and a yellow van parked at a wrong angle in the parking lot. Seeing movement on the ground, I quickly park my car and run over, mobile phone in hand dialing 911.
I get to the scene, where a relatively young woman has fallen from the van in her wheelchair, which then toppled over. She hit her head hard on th pavment. She’s conscious, and a small group of good samaritans including my neighbor are trying to help her move.
I tell them to wait a moment before moving her and ask her, “Ma’am, what happened, exactly?” She went on to explain that she’d fallen and hit her head. “Did you black out?” says I. “For a moment” she responds, “but I’m fine, I’m fine. Just help me up.”
I say, “Look, if you’ve hit your head, please, please just wait til the ambulance gets here. You could be injured and shouldn’t be moved.”
She says “I’m a nurse! I say it’s okay!” To which I of course reply “Then you of all people should know how dangerous it is to have these people move you.” I wasn’t going to continue debating the issue, she was already in distress and obviously her pride was getting the better of her.
Fortunately the police showed up and took hold of the situation before anyone actually moved her.
I’m glad that people ran to her rescue, she could have been killed in that parking lot as large trucks go in and out of it and might not have had a clear view of her. But trying to move her (none of us had any idea why she was in a wheelchair to begin with) was a dangerous thing for her, a kind thing for people to try to do but the entirely wrong thing from a medical standpoint. In my overly litigious nation, it’s also a lawsuit waiting to happen if she’d been injured or her injuries made worse from being moved.
Am I just insane to try and do the right thing? Is it this sort of thing that makes most people just give up and say “screw it, why bother to try and help anyway?”
Filed under: society
Posted by: Molly | 15:51 | Comments (25)
In what way can ‘trying to do the right thing’ ever be insane? Sure, you might not be thanked for it, and some people with a different idea of ‘the right thing’ might cause you some grief, but isn’t it better to know you’ve done your best to make someone’s life better in whatever way you can?
Like all good presents: it’s the thought that counts. Acting on it counts even more.
You may be the reason that woman is safe today. The only person in the crowd with the complete understanding of how dangerous the situation was…and the guts to state your mind, despite the will of the crowd. While the woman was a nurse, she was laying on the ground and had just been hit in the head, so I wouldn’t trust her judgement.
And yet, despite your best efforts, your words of wisdom could have been ignored. Rather than just think “screw it”, I like to think, You said what you thought needed to be said. You stood your ground. But you are not responsible for people making poor decisions.
So cool that you stopped. I really think you made a difference.
I think you did the right thing in all aspects…
I had a very bad cycle accident in 1997 and I was very fortunate that several people (including an off-duty police lady) stopped what they were doing to help me. They did move me from where I was lying because I was in the middle of a very busy road (but in hindsight perhaps I shouldn’t have been moved at all as it could have made my injuries worse). It seems coming off a mountain bike at 35-40 mph in an urban area wasn’t that important to the local emergency services though because I then lay there, by the side of the road, in lots of pain for a further 45 minutes before the ambulance arrived! Hmmmm….
I was so impressed by the random actions of the public that day that I had a letter printed in the local newspaper thanking the kind strangers.
Still – you did well Molly (you should be proud of that) and I hope the lady was grateful.
Definitely help. I’m in Australia and things aren’t quite as “lawyer-crazy” here (yet!) so I can’t speak for the lawsuit factor… but giving others a hand when it’s needed – or coming together to support something or someone – has to be one of the key ingredients that has built this country. And just as importantly, help “smart” (you know, like think “different”) – which you did by not moving her, despite her protest. The world needs more of you around, Molly (and not just for your web stuff)!
You definitely did the right thing. You were right in telling her that as a nurse she of all people should know that she shouldn’t be moved. Anyone who casually watches ER knows that too. I can’t believe she wanted to throw caution (and possibly her life) to the wind so casually. Good decision on your part!
I think you did the right thing, Molly. I learned that you should never move an accident victim who may have a neck or spinal injury b/c you could make it worse. Only properly-trained medical personnel know how to properly handle the body and secure the neck area to avoid further injury. As a lay person, I would have done the same as you . . . call 911 and try to offer comfort to the injured and not let anyone do anything stupid. Maybe the injured person was actually in shock or having an adrenaline rush from the fall and didn’t mean to be rude or say she knew better. She may have been in denial of what was happening due to her injuries. People like you, who care enough to stop to help, matter.
Sound judgement trumps pride and emotional convenience every time. You did the right thing, period. Her discomfort pales in comparison to the alternatives. What if she had been moved and further injured, or worse, died of a subsequent neck or spinal injury? Her death would have been a crushing, preventable tragedy. It would also have been compounded by the effect on the people who moved her. How horrible would it be to have someone die by your hand when you were only trying to help? What a tragic way to forever mark the holiday season. No, you did all concerned a huge favor. Bravo, Molly.
I think you did the right thing. *Never* move someone if they’ve been injured, *especially* if they’ve hit their head. They could be suffering from neck/head/spinal damage.
Stay strong. You did the right thing.
I’d like to think that by just leaving her there and walking away after a remark like that, I’d be doing the right thing. I have a low tolerance for mean people.
I’d like to think we’d all inadvertantly do the right thing and hope not to be sued in that situation. That you have to worry about such things is a shocking thing!
Good work.
I think you did the right thing and no matter how it ended up in the end atleast you tried to help.Way to stay cool and handle the situation.
As usual, you did good.
A couple of years ago, I had a horrendous accident on my motorbike. I was hit from behind by a car going about 50mph and trying to run a red light. (I was stationary)
I did exactly the same thing as the woman in the wheelchair — as soon as I was conscious I was all trying to get up or pull myself to the side of the ride, because there was traffic and all sorts.
Luckily for me, there were people like yourself around, Molly, who stopped me doing anything stupid. I probably have an intact spine and the use of my legs today purely because they overrode my stupidity.
I was confused and not really aware of what had happened and just wanted to get up and check on my bike. I am eternally grateful that they stopped me and made me lie still until the ambulance came along.
I hope that the lady you helped has had the same realisation and right now is beating up on herself for snapping at you.
No, I think you did the right thing. And just because people aren’t grateful for kind acts doesn’t mean we should stop doing them. I’m sure what you did was quietly appreciated. No use adding the sin of apathy towards your neighbor to pride.
Molly, you took the correct action. I am certified in Red Cross First Aid training and was a life guard for many years. Many people rush to judgment, when they should not move the injured individual and take a second and think about what course of action to take. Unless of course not moving the person could result in further bodily harm or death.
You were of sound mind and hopefully the lady thanks you in the future, if not well good things happen to those you do good things.
I love living in New Zealand, in a situation such as this there would have been no chance of a lawsuit. I’m a little scared of coming to America and being in that environment with a constant fear of litigation.
Anybody’s–even an expert’s–judgement is likely to be off after a serious head bonking like that. So you were 100% correct to defy the nurse’s assessment of her own condition.
I witnessed a pretty nasty car crash just over a year ago. So I run over all Mr FirstAidCertificateMan and try to get people to stay put in cars in case of aggrevating neck injuries and whatnot. Which failed miserably.
I reckon if someone is so determined to ignore enforced medical advice, then there is a good chance they’re mostly ok. Or drunk. It’s the quiet ones you’ve got to look out for. But you don’t know till you’ve tried. So yes, you did the right thing.
Airbags are well recommended, by the way.
Molly,
I’m a retired elementary teacher whose father was a dedicated First Aid Instructor. When someone goes down, they somehow lose their humanity. Most people stand around and look (down on) at them, and say things like “Are you all right?”. (duh!)
I worked hard with my students to get them to get me or another adult to the scene and then move away and give the injured person some space, fresh air, and privacy. Almost always, once the other students moved away, the injured student stopped struggling to get up.
You were, in my opinion, absolutely correct in what you did, both in getting the woman to stay down and in arguing with her and ‘the pack’ that she should stay down.
Please don’t get disillusioned. Keep knowing that you are doing the right action and that the injured person needs you to do that no matter what they say.
I’m sure we are all familiar with the quote ” the cobbeler’s children wear no shoes”. After working in the nursing field for many years, I can attest to the fact that we are horrible patients and are very prone to not follow the advise we dish out every day. I work in the psychiatric arena. It is of paramount importance that pts. NEVER stop taking their meds. cold turkey and without talking to their doctor. Well, I was on an antidepressent for several months. You can see where I’m heading. Sure enough, I felt all better so a stopped the meds, coldturkey. I was OK for 30 days (all med have diiferent life cycles. Out of no where the entire weight of the universe fell on me. One minute I was fine and the next I could barely function…of course I was at work at the time so my reaction was impossible to hide. Well, I got it from all sides, “you of all people should no better. You made a similar statement to the nurse in the wheel chair. Your confrontation may have been the thing she couldn’t ignore. Quick thinking! Your insistance that she not be moved may have have saved her further injury and anyone with a potential head injury isn’t usually thinking clearly! One time I stopped because a man was trying to walk into traffic (delusional). I didn’t have anywhere near his strengh and it was all I could do to keep a grip on him. It was early rush hour and car after car just stared at us. Finally, A man stopped and the two of us held on untill EMS arrived. I am still astounded at how many people didn’t care. If the other person hadn’t stopped, I remain convinced I would have witnessed his death.
You did the right thing!
Melinda Cherry
I think you did the right thing… but in situations like this, you have to look at all the options.
Here’s an optional course of action for the next time:
Molly: Are you alright?
Eating The Cement: Yes, I’m fine… I just fell and hit my head.
M: Well, don’t move – if you hit your head, there could be complications. You shoud wait for the ambulance.
ETC: Well, I’m a nurse, and I say I’m okay… so get away from me.
M: Hmm. It could be very dangerous… very dangerous indeed. Why, while you’re getting up, someone could kick you in the head. (just nail her in the forehead with your right heel)
ETC: Ow! Jesus! You just broke my eye socket!
M: Worse yet, (help her up) you could slip and fall in front of a moving vehicle (throw her in front of an oncoming car.)
ETC: Errrgurgle…
M: …and as you’re laying there, coughing up your own fluids, some poor homeless guy could trip over you (attack the nearest wino and grab his bottle of peppermint schnapps) and spill his liquor into your eyes!
ETC: EEEERRGURGLE SCREECH!
M: In conclusion, I think it’s safe to say that you’ve learned how dangerous it can be to move someone with a head injury like yours.
ETC: erk…
M: No problem. Glad I could be here to assist.
“Am I just insane to try and do the right thing? Is it this sort of thing that makes most people just give up and say “screw it, why bother to try and help anyway?”
Molly, is this your opinion about the web? Don’t be any less persistent in life than you are in cyber-life.
Molly, no matter how the injured party reacted to your attempts to help her, you did the right thing in showing deep concern for her physical well-being. Never let anyone’s reaction to YOU influence negative change in the person you are deep down inside. It’s what makes you a beautiful person in the eyes of your true friends.
“Am I just insane to try and do the right thing? Is it this sort of thing that makes most people just give up and say ’screw it, why bother to try and help anyway?’”
NO!
Wow, quite a story! I agree that you did the right things, and I have been in similar situations where people are wanting to help, want to do the right things, but now everyone knows about moving someone could hurt them.. I think it is good that we human beings feel the need to want to rech out and touch / help people when they are hurt… it’s just unforunate that there is not more education about medical issues like that.
Thank you for mentioning our litigous society… every since that mcdonalds cofee incident I have been realizing that more and more!
It is difficult sometimes to stand up and suggest something different to a crowd of people in the middle of doing something, but you did it! Good job!
What can ya do? Yot try to do the right thing, and people don’t appreciate it, I would just walk away and make sure I am not around should something go wrong. It seems that everyone including 10 year olds have cell phone these days, and people often do not need as much help as they use to.. plus everyone has seen ER and and CSI, so everyone is a DR. or lawyer on thier own