molly.com
Saturday 27 September 2003
quizzical quiznos commercials
Do you have a Quiznos Sub Sandwich Shop in your neighborhood? Well, their sandwiches might be endearing, but their T.V. commercials are just damned wrong.
Two guys are on lunch break. One, who has a a “toasted” sandwich in hand, wonders why his lunch pal made such a bad, untoasted lunch choice.
“Were you raised by wolves?” asks the guy with the toasted sandwich.
The dude with the inferior sandwich has a sudden flashback. There are two versions of this, which you can see yourself by following the links to the actual commercials, of which Quiznos appears to be rather proud (Quicktime required).
- Flashback one: A female wolf nurses several young. Also sucking at her teat is the guy. An adult male human, sucking at the teat of a wolf.
- Flashback two: The guy is in the wolf den with his “mother” and siblings. They are licking at his pale, emaciated face enthusiastically.
If there’s a joke in all of this, I’ve missed it. The idea of a male adult human sucking a wolf teat, no matter how nutrient-rich the colustrum, is not only wrong, but it definitely does not work. I do not now or ever want to eat a Quiznos sandwich.
Filed under: general
Posted by: site admin | 10:16 | Comments (171)
Hey i learned the song on guitar and sang it. EAT QUIZNOS SUBS!!!!!
I’ve seen alot of commercials and many of them stick in my head. Some people say that any publicity is good publicity, but I beg to differ.
I will not patronize an establishment whose commercials or business practices insult my intelligence or sensibilities. Quiznos has succeeded in joining that rank with the rat thing, as has the republican party and most organized religions.
Holy crap people have way too much time on their hands it this made a web page at all… This is far from being a tasteless thing… you think this is bad try…
http://www.babysmasher.com/
http://www.corpseclothing.com/index.asp
http://www.cafepress.com/malpractice1
http://dmoz.org/Shopping/Clothing/Casual/T-Shirts/Humor/
or
http://www.tshirthell.com/hell.shtml
btw i love all of these pages and i am not some stupid kid or deranged freak. Good God People lighten UP!
HEY! Thanks for putting my site up in the ranks of T-shirt hell. I love you.
hi my name is maggie i so love this i always go on this becouse ive been writing and that whont put me on it so im making a commplate are i will never come on this again please write back
i always go on this website is fantasic
Howdy, ma’am. Never eaten at Quiznos, don’t plan to. I LOVE THOSE COMMERCIALS!!!! Shoot! Missed the “wolf tit” one! No one seems to get the Chrome/THIRD FROM THE SUN (google it, nitwits) graphical reference with the big eyes and such. I was impressed not at all that anyone had “accomplished” something with this campaign, but that they GOT AWAY WITH IT. Therein lies the key to dealing with the greedheads and moneyrapists: convince ‘em you got something they want/can use, respond with material that’s an inscrutable slap at their sensibilities/plans and BLEED ‘EM DRY. Remember the biological roots of all warfare: NO MORE of THEM, just more and more and more of US. Have a blessed day…I’m Pat.
i always go on this website is fantasic
thanks
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Thanks for that visual Molly! Now i know why i don’t watch TV
Place a Link to Your SERVICE
good article
thanks
thank you
thanks to molly.
gg
thanks
good thankss